Urg, But Not Eep

I've been mulling over modesty, lately.  Elena's reached That Age (already?!?) so she and I got to have a few... Conversations (I know!!!) this last week.  Along with a changing body comes a change in how people perceive you, though, and while she's never had any problem showing modesty in dress, she has a long way to go for behavior, especially when it comes to how she moves in skirts.  How do I really explain modesty without getting into the one Conversation I haven't had with her and she doesn't (well, shouldn't) need to have for another couple years?

Modesty has been a pretty hot topic on Facebook lately.  There have been lots of links to articles and blog posts.  There was one that noted that the word "modest"  is only used twice in the bible, both times in an "of modest means" sort of way, advising the saints to not flaunt whatever prosperity they may rise to.  It reminded me of The Book of Mormon's mentions of fine-twined linens in the pride cycles.


On the more usual interpretation, she knows--because we've said it many times--that we keep ourselves, especially the areas covered by our undies and said undies themselves, covered up because they're not other people's business.  I was looking for something more solid than that, good as it is.  I had an epiphany, a week ago, and was able to relate the topic to something analogous but not as fraught with subtext and blame-throwing.  It takes the form of a quick Socratic question session:

Is it impolite for your brother to read your personal thoughts that you put in your private journal?  Of course it is.  That being said, is it then impolite for you to hang poster-sized prints of the contents of that journal around the house?  Your answer to that will say much. 

Then I saw this.  It's a hypothetical conversation between a man and his son.  It made me want to formulate my own for my daughter.

~
Sweetheart, there are many kinds of men out there.  And they've all looked at you.  It's because you're becoming a woman.  It's in the nature of things.  ...

It's the way they look that matters, though.  There are some men that will look at you and only see a piece of meat.  You've done nothing to deserve that, and there's nothing you can do to prevent it.  Those men will always see every woman that way.  Ignore them, they're not worth your time.  Trying to beat them in that game is a losing proposition.  It's like wrestling a muddy pig--you get dirty and the pig has fun.

There are, however, good men who will look at you as a whole person, one with thoughts and dreams, skills and talents, and a sense of wonder and adventure that will leave him breathless.  They are the men who don't want to only see you for your legs or curves, as much as those things are attractive to them, who want to respect you and treat you right.  Those are the men that are worth encouraging, those are the ones you want to attract.  For their sakes, not the others', it is most polite and most fair to not make them work so hard at maintaining the self-discipline they've been working on.

Remember, your responsibility is to see yourself dressed before you leave your room, and not undo that work once you leave it.  The man's responsibility is to see you for who you are, not what your clothing may or may not hint at.  Both sides work together.  They share equal responsibility with equal reward. 

Clean and Pure

She's 8 years old!  How crazy is that?  It's seems like both yesterday and a thousand years ago that I welcomed my first tiny miracle to this world, and she's gotten so big, now.

We took pictures to celebrate such an important birthday.

Today was her baptism.  She looked so beautiful, all dressed in white with her Daddy by her side.

When we got home she opened one more set of presents--brand new scriptures and a case to keep them in.

Girls...

It's odd how life works out, sometimes.  I caught this picture of Elena and Lucy at Elena's baptism, today...

...because of this one from my niece's baptism, 8 years ago.

It's the same dress, one of only 3 or 4 dresses to survive the fire because they'd never gotten put away properly.

For the sake of comparison, here are better close-ups.

Ladybugs!

Elena started planning this party as soon as we got done with Joseph's pirate party, two years ago.  I haven't been ready for it, though.  I was pregnant and nauseous for both those birthdays.  This year I got things together.  We made flower hair clips, though I didn't get pictures.  We played Pin The Ladybug on the Picnic.

We ate aphids on a log and flower sandwiches on a picnic blanket.

Daddy made another one of his famous piñatas.

We found an actual ladybug in the grass.

And we ate yummy cupcakes.  I'm really happy with how they came out.

Thank you to everyone who could make it out, we were so happy to have you here.

Back on Schedule

It's school time! 

 The kids have been giddy with excitement and now it's finally here.

There were some bumpy parts, getting classes and teachers worked out.  Joseph was originally put in a Spanish class, but switched because he doesn't speak Spanish.  Then he got put back in the Spanish class and had to be switched again.  In the end, he's in a dual-language class, so he'll learn some Spanish after all.

Elena had a teacher, but got moved to make room for all the new kids, but that teacher wasn't G/T certified and Elena really needs a G/T teacher so she got switched back.  When we got to school, on Monday, we had to find out which of the three possible teachers she'd be with.  I'm glad we talked with all of them at Meet the Teacher, last week, so we already knew what to expect and she could walk right in and get settled.

 It's so nice to have my days on a schedule, again.  I know when I need to get up, when I can run errands, when to have dinner ready, and when we all need to be in bed.  Sometimes, things get hectic, but I know what's going on and I feel like I've got a handle on things.

And none of that would be possible without this:

 Right before school started (seriously--Saturday or Sunday night) Lucy decided that it would be OK if she settled down to sleep at 10 or 11pm, instead of the 1 or 2am that she'd been doing all summer.  With that, she also started sleeping through the night, most nights, then wakes up for a light breakfast and goes back to sleep.

 

 I have gotten mountains of laundry washed, folded and put away, the last two mornings.  I feel so productive for the first time in months.


Why laundry?  Well, 1: the kids were out of not-school clothes, and 2: since the house is relatively empty I decided to just stick James in underpants, apply lots of juice, hang out in the bathroom all day, and deal with whatever laundry results.  It's past time and it just needs to be done.  He kept asking for a diaper, the first day, but after his initial frustration of having Mom say No has resigned himself.  He does pretty well if he's naked, which is what did the trick for Joseph, so we'll see.

Bluebeard ...and Blackbeard

I'm not sure how we managed to avoid it for so long.  Sure Joseph had been there, but that's Joseph and it wasn't in the "right" place anyway.  I guess it was just time and we'd avoided it long enough.

Two split chins, on two children, with two sets of stitches, in one month.

James slipped while climbing the couch, at the end of July.

Elena bounced off a bigger kid and into a pole at the splashpad, last week.

I Swear! Other Stuff Happened, Too!

I've been a bit absent, the last couple months.  The late stages of pregnancy will do that.  Things happened, though, I promise.

I planted bulbs, and though only the paperwhites came up they were my favorites anyway.   One of then even bloomed!

We had the usual Easter party at my Mom's.  I missed having Dad there, especially with it being a new house and all.  So much change, but having family together will always be the same.

We colored and hunted our own eggs, at home.

The kids decided to film their own movie, a thrilling adaptation of Little Miss Muffet.  This would be one of the stills from the set.

The Aztex are back!  And we got tickets!  We've been to a couple games and it's always a good time.

We got a car, too.  It is a Mazda5, but not the one from the other post.  For $5k less we got 2 years newer, 50k less miles, leather seats and tinted windows.  Yeah.

A sunflower sprouted up in our back yard, fell over, then produced blossoms all up the length of the stem.  There's probably 100 or more flowers on it.

Joseph turned 6!  He asked for a square cake that was chocolate with chocolate and M&Ms.  He wore his Super Cape to the soccer game, too.

Yes, Lucy came two days later.  Several people asked me when I was due, at church.  I told them "Technically, a week and a half.  In all practicality, any day, now."  I was at that very moment having contractions that never actually went away.  Here she is at home, getting all settled in.

She makes the big kids (all 3 of them!) look enormous.

And finally, today, at about noon, Joseph lost his first tooth.  He's so excited!

Finally!!!

This third tooth has been loose for 6 months. 6 months! The first two came out before school got out, in early June, and this one started wiggling about the same time. We waited through the summer, and through the fall. It's been hanging by a thread for weeks. Jonathan wondered if she was the only kid ever who didn't sit there and wiggle her tooth for untold hours until it popped free. I finally took a really good look at it, yesterday, and noticed that the new tooth was already through, underneath. Enough was enough. I grabbed it and gave a quick, hard pull. Pop! All better. And her new smile is so stinkin' cute.

A Year of Knitting

(WARNING: This post is picture heavy. But so pretty...)

Remember this picture from last year?


Those were my plans for the year, knitting-wise. As usually happens in life, some got done, others didn't, and a bunch of other stuff found it's way in, too.

There were tall socks to keep my feet from freezing at the Temple.


Fingerless gloves to keep my hands warm but still functional. (I hate it when I can't feel what it is I'm touching. It makes me feel all fumbley.)

Socks for James.


And Jonathan.


A small shawl to keep the chill off. I've actually got this one wrapped around my neck right this moment.


Socks for me, too.

There were gifts, too. For Craig's graduation.


Regan's birthday.


Richard's first baby. (A boy. The headband is because I had extra yarn and it pays to be prepared for future possibilities.)

(and an actual view of the sweater.)

More socks. (It was a sock club, after all.) Mine...


and Jonathan again.


Costume help for some nieces and their friends.


New stockings for Mom and Dad.



Sweaters for Elena and Joseph. (James just likes to say cheese for the camera.)


Socks for Mom and Dad, too.




And then there's these. Ready and waiting for their Owner's arrival, in June.


(I know June is hot. Hospitals are cold, though, and my baby absolutely deserves cashmere.)